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But I’m the old, frail one in the family…NOT!!

While I was away in New Zealand, both Gil and L’il Sis had medical issues. Gill went from Crohn’s flare-up to period cramps to bladder infection requiring antibiotics (which she hates),to urine tests, to more tests in hospital. What on earth is wrong with her now? I must say, considering the pain she was experiencing, her emails to me were relatively low-key. But I realize that she was trying not to set me off in a panic. I do appreciate that.

She, of course, took to the internet to self-diagnose. Now, with most people, that approach is extremely ill-advised. For instance, every time I have a small symptom of something, I turn to the Mayo clinic site and do just that. It never ends well. By the time I finish, I am convinced I am dying of several major illnesses and there is nothing to be done. But here I am, still standing, having recently traveled halfway around the world and relatively healthy for my age. Gill, however, has become rather an expert in researching medical issues.

As I said, Gill’s emails to me were (and I thank her now for this) short and, although she did say she was in pain, she didn’t say enough to set me into full-on panic mode.Only when I returned did I get the full, ugly picture– a picture still not entirely clear.

While Gill was dealing with her issues, L’il Sis sent an email towards the end of my trip announcing that she was coming here to return Mrs. Beeton (my pink parakeet) and stop in at the local pharmacy to pick up her ‘wheelbarrow’ full of prescriptions.

OMG, what is wrong with this family? If I were to list the diseases/conditions we all have and the number of different meds it takes us simply to get up in the morning and function at a basic level, it would take an entire page. Not double spaced. To whit: extra-strength Tylenol, a daily small dose aspirin, high blood pressure meds (2), a weekly drug for osteoporosis, vitamins, glucosamine and Vitamin D, nsaids, anti-anxiety drugs and anti-depressants, muscle relaxants and Advil…and that’s just today. By tomorrow, judging by the way Crazy D limped into my house today, there could be more. I won’t mention which of the above drugs are for which person, but between us we are keeping several doctors and physiotherapists in golf memberships. And to see us on the street, you’d think we were a normal family. Ha!

I did take some comfort in the fact that, if Gill’s kidney stones or Crohn’s were to result in kidney failure, I might be able to donate the extra kidney I was told years ago I have. Then a recent x-ray refuted that and the doc told me I do not have an extra one. How you could make a mistake like that I leave to the medical profession to explain, but there you go. Sorry, Gill, you’re out of luck on that one. And over the years, I have taken so many drugs for so many things, I’m guessing it’s only a matter of time before one of MY kidneys fails…

An email from her today notes another test she must have when they can book it. That might give us the definitive answer. Or not. I do not hold out much hope. In the meantime, perhaps we’ll need a bigger wheelbarrow than the one L’il Sis currently has to carry all the prescriptions. I think I feel a migraine coming on…oh, but not to worry…I’m sure we have medication for that somewhere.

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