My family loves the ad on television that shows the taco guy ‘helping out’ the mom trying to relieve the monotony of yet another nondescript dinner. The same thing, same day every week, week after week.
Ha! That guy should come to MY kitchen. I would present him with an insurmountable challenge. Crazy D was asking yesterday what we were having for dinner. “Chicken,” I answered.
“Cluck, buk, buk, buk…” he said. “You do realize we had it last night, the night before that and the night before that. The previous day you mixed it up and we had chicken for lunch. No criticism meant, Mom, since you are kind enough to cook for us, but I think the chicken is getting old. I know my taste buds are…”
“Well, you’re not the only one living here, ” I retorted. “And thank you for reminding me. I need to buy more chicken for tomorrow. The Pig (L’il Sis’ beagle) needs a fresh supply of chicken soup for her lunch. At least SOMEONE here appreciates my cooking and the effort I make in providing delicious food.”
“Not meaning to seem ungrateful or pick a fight, but REALLY? The Pig gets the deciding vote on what we eat?”
“You could do much worse than chicken every day,” I continued. “The Pig had her vet checkup today and she passed with flying colors. For a dog who recently lost her spleen to cancer, I’d say she is something of a miracle. Ah, the healing capacities of chicken soup!”
“Jeez…next thing, you’ll be plotting with Gill on Skype again. I thought she’d given up that stupid idea of having egg laying chickens in the yard. Has she moved on to convincing you that meat chickens is the way to go? ‘Cause 24 mallard ducks quacking in the yard isn’t enough?”
“Oh, for pete’s sake! You think you have it bad? When I was in the Caymans recently, our friends were being plagued with roosters crowing all night long…in a suburban area. Seems the hurricane a few years back liberated them from their pens and they’ve been roaming the island ever since. They are in backyards, wandering on the streets, in parking lots, outside schools and supermarkets. For all I know, they have infiltrated the government. And they’ve been reproducing. It’s not unusual to see an entire family cross the street, the rooster crowing proudly at his accomplishment. So be careful. Things could be much worse than a few ducks. And as long as The Pig is doing so well on the chicken soup diet, we’ll all be eating chicken. If you start to sprout wings, let me know. Until then, be productive and start looking for new chicken recipes.”